You, Me & OCD
Derek Ferris
Author Bio
Derek grew up with his family in Central Oregon. He began having OCD symptoms at about age 12 after recovering from a severe strep infection. Through his research in later years, Derek determined there was a high likelihood that he developed PANDAS (Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated with Streptococcus), which is caused by an inflammatory response in the basal ganglia area of the brain. Popular theories suggest this area of the brain is responsible in helping a person decide what possible behaviors to execute at any given time. Derek’s parents sought psychiatric support from a child therapist, who educated him on the necessary recovery techniques. However, it was not until much later in life he found the motivation to put his disorder into perspective and began to make positive changes. He moved to a new city, made new friends, and found love. Derek resides in the Pacific Northwest and lives with wife Melissa. Her persistence made him acknowledge the need to take responsibility for his OCD by taking medication, seeking therapy, and sharing his story through the writing of his book. Derek’s passion for self-expression developed while taking college courses in writing and public speaking. As an OCD sufferer who has slowly broken his silence, he continues to raise awareness through his book.
Description
Starting at the age of 12, Derek’s life began to get much more complicated. An internal struggle was about to take hold; it’s grip would cause unimaginable anxiety. The normal thoughts and feelings he had prior were a distant memory. This had to be dealt with using irrational methods. Over time he had to manage and cope the best way he could. This is a true account of one Northwest man’s experiences living with the mental disorder known as OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder). Take a journey into his mind and view life as he sees it. The book tells Derek’s story using a timeline approach. It begins with an introduction that takes a detailed look at the thoughts of anxiety and self-motivation that occur on a daily basis. Finding balance is a priority that is often difficult to achieve for anyone but even more so for a person suffering with a mental disorder. Over the course of the book, you will explore the theory around what caused Derek’s OCD to develop, relationship and friendship successes and failures, family struggles, and a life-changing car accident that forced him to examine the self-destructive path he was on.
After reading this book, you will have gained a unique insight to the intrusive thoughts that lead to time-consuming compulsions for a person living with OCD. If you are a sufferer yourself, Derek’s humorous and emotional writing style will resonate a sense of joint compassion and understanding that is often difficult for family and friends to comprehend and have sympathy for. It takes a long time to learn to separate the OCD from the person who has it and Derek has spent over two decades keeping most of his struggles to himself. He believed hiding his OCD from his family helped them to cope better. Changing behaviors is not easy for the average person and is 100 times more difficult for OCD sufferers but families often don’t see it that way. Learning to tolerate uncertainty, developing positive self-talk and using successful stress management techniques are vital skills that Derek will continue to conquer for the rest of his life.
Book excerpt
Chapter 1
OCD & ME
Here we go again! Another day of annoying, irksome obligations I don’t want to do. I have to do it because not doing it would be even worse. It’s my continuous suffer-either-way scenario in the life of Derek. No way out…just make the best of it, don’t screw it up, and most importantly get it done and over with so you can squeeze in some YOU time with peace of mind! Balance…got to work on balance. I can’t just squeeze in life’s pleasures all the time. I have made my life demanding and I’m fighting to keep up. I, of course get lazy, prolonging whatever agonizing task I must do for a better suited day. I’m too fearful, nervous, and stubborn to just completely stop my ways. I just keep on moving forward with my day-to-day living with some type of motivation for a better tomorrow. Give me peace of mind and the rest will follow. The problem is peace of mind comes and goes all day long. Some days are better than others. My good days last temporarily like a drug slowing wearing off. I figure I must stay strong, f
ocused and driven if I am to find salvation. I can have it all, I hope. It will come from knowing what works and what doesn’t. I will have to keep an open mind for workable solutions I can incorporate and use. Only time will tell if I’m able to eventually enjoy most of this life I’ve been given.
These thoughts have come to me as a result of living with OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder) since I was 12. I am now 34 and have been struggling ever since. I have yet to hit rock bottom…but fight thoughts everyday in a constant struggle to keep my anxiety level down. It can feel as if I’m on a roller coaster ride where at first you’re alright then all of a sudden your heart is racing and you want to scream. I’ve come to learn that not being at ease dramatically changes who I am. I become a more withdrawn person to everyone around me. I am consumed in thought as I analyze what needs to be fixed according to my OCD’s rules and regulations. I can become my old self again…but at a price. The price I have always had to pay has been through my viewed behaviors and exhausting private rituals. My time, money, reputation, and occasionally my sanity are also at risk when certain attempts are made to fix an issue I’m having. The compulsions involved can build up and have the ability to create major self-destruction for me. What I strive to do is limit my need to behave, waste, and spend in the name of OCD until I can’t anymore. OCD must always eventually be taken care of and on a bad day it will take over completely. It’s a lot like having an annoying part of yourself that follows you around convincing you to do things all day.
There are times when I am even affected subconsciously through my dreams. I awake anxietized fearing the worst has happened. I could have dreamt a situation gone badly or a mistake made that had a lasting effect on me. Needless to say, my mind is always stressing somehow. Constant concerns of what needs to be done and how it’s going to be accomplished have a way of creeping into my thoughts whether I’m awake or not. A peaceful night’s rest is always welcome when I can get it.
Author Website
http://www.ocdbook.blogspot.com/